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Ellie's avatar

My main struggle with Dostoevsky is that his way of thinking is so fundamentally alien to my own. Last entry you told us to read this as a morality tale rather than a psychological investigation, and I'm TRYING to—with varying results.

I definitely appreciate what it means to choose Sonya to deliver the Gospel, especially in that time period. My heart bleeds for her, for having to deal with Raskolnikov on top of everything else. Can you imagine, having to become a parent to your own parents and siblings? Having to sell yourself in order for them not to starve? I'm so angry that she lives in a world that told her she's a sinner and not a victim. I'm so angry that everyone has failed her on such a spectacular level and religion is the only thing stopping her from plunging into desperation. There is something fundamentally wrong in a society where the poorest can either pray or go insane, where there's no help other than God's. (Which is not to say that religion is bad, although I'm not religious myself I do respect people who can find meaning in it. I'm glad Sonya has it and Rodion will have it at some point.)

Still the fact remains that she and her family will probably starve or die of consumption or end up in the streets, and while Rodion goes about it the wrong way (he chooses violence instead of being kind, to her and to others), he is not lying. He has a knack to go beyond social conventions and tell uncomfortable truths out loud. And he is so lonely, so desperate to find kinship in a world that treats him like an alien. Poor Sonya is the only person who doesn't act selfishly around him, did you notice? All the others are telling him that the way he acts upsets them, Sonya can see how truly sad he is and genuinely wants to help. She shouldn't have to, though.

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Bookworm Julia's avatar

I was starting to get worried about Sonya’s safety as Raskolnikov was becoming more unhinged here. At the same time, it was incredibly tragic to see these two souls in despair and poverty.

As soon as it was mentioned that the room next door was extension of Resslich’s and there wasn’t Kapernaumov family there, it gave me proper chills - Svidrigailov seems to be a very menacing and dark figure literally hiding in the shadows. I’m worried what’s to come from him…Brrr

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